Tilly's Trans Tuesdays

A weekly examination of trans life, trans representation in media, allyship, and even the broad basics of existing as a trans person in our society.

If you're looking for the text versions, please visit TillysTransTuesdays.com.

About The Show

When I publicly came out as trans, I was keenly aware of how much privilege I was giving up in transitioning from a white (seemingly) cis man to a white trans woman. But I was also very much aware of how much privilege I still had. Which is not to say femme white trans ladies have a lot of privilege in our society, but we certainly have more than every trans woman of color.

On top of that, so many trans people lose spouses, family, friends, homes, and jobs when we come out, and I basically lost none of that. So I remain remarkably more privileged than most trans women, and I recognize that and I wanted to USE it to help people.

I’m a writer, it’s what I do. So I had the thought that I would chronicle my transition, and talk about things cis people might never realize about society, and do what I could to take as much pressure off of other trans people as I could. I had no idea how long I’d be writing them, I thought I’d just talk until I ran out of things to talk about. But that never happened, because so many more things keep getting added to the list. Things I myself never even realized (and couldn’t have) until well into my transition.

So here we are, two and a half years after they started, and there’ve been over one hundred installments (this is 119!) and my mega 24-thread deep dive into the intentional trans allegories of the Matrix movies will be released as a book in the summer of 2023. And it’s that book that actually got me thinking about my Trans Tuesdays as a whole. I was a little hesitant to turn the Matrix threads into a book at first, even though many people who’ve read them have asked for exactly that.

But a very small percentage of the population is on social media, and a book could reach an entirely new audience of people. And so many people have told me how those Matrix threads, and these threads in general, have helped them. And that’s the whole reason I started these. I just want to help people. To be as much of a resource as I can. And that led me to the realization that these threads could reach a lot more people if they were also in another medium.

I don’t speak for all trans people. All I can give you is my own perspective. But with the podcast, now I can also give other trans people a platform to talk about these same issues, to share their thoughts on what being trans means to them.

I want to celebrate us, to share the beauty and complexity of our existence with the world. And whether you read on social media, read them from the website, or listen to the podcast (or all three!), thank you for joining me on this journey.

Tilly Bridges
Executive Producer
Pendant Productions

Art

Wallpaper

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Episode Archive

Trans Trauma 2: Societal Gaslighting

Episode Number: 95

Welcome to the season two finale! I dunno if you've realized, but all of society gaslights trans people about the very nature of our existence. It's bad actually! We're gonna talk about how exactly that happens, and the effect that can have on a person who's absorbed it for an entire lifetime. Social worker Charlie Hutchinson returns to discuss reconstructing oppression into joy and victory! Let's also talk about... the compulsory heterosexuality of dishwashing gloves?!

CONTENT WARNING: this episode includes a frank discussion of trauma, including suicidal ideation and hate crimes.

Trans Tuesdays will return in mid-January 2025!

Episode download: TTT095.mp3

CHARLIE HUTCHINSON
Instagram: @c_t_hutchinson
Facebook: Charlie Hutchinson
Bluesky: @charliehutch.bsky.social

TEXT VERSION

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Trans Grief 1-2, Trans Intersectionality, Implicit Queerphobia, Internalized Transphobia, Gendered Childhoods, The False Dichotomy, Searching for Meaning (when you're trans and don't know it), Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1), Sexuality is Not Gender, The Signs Were Always There (that we're trans), How Do You Know if You're Trans?, The Trans Allegory of Barbie, The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, The Trans Allegory of s1 of Silo, The Past and Why it Haunts Us, The Past 2: The New Past, Gender Dysphoria, Trans Trauma 1, A Trans Re-wedding

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C
Origin Of The Term Gaslighting - https://www.simplypsychology.org/origin-of-the-term-gaslighting.html

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

REFERENCE MATERIAL
How Lord Of The Rings Made The Hobbits Look Small (With Almost No CGI) - https://screenrant.com/lord-rings-movie-hobbits-small-size-film-camera-how-no-cgi/
How to Make a Hobbit With Forced Perspective - https://www.wired.com/2012/12/how-to-make-a-hobbit-with-forced-perspective/
The Science Behind the Selfie (No, You Don't Really Look Like That) - https://oohstloustudios.com/the-science-of-the-selfie-no-you-dont-really-look-like-that

Release Date: December 17, 2024

Run Time: 43:57
Trans Trauma 1: That Old Dysphoric Feeling

Episode Number: 94

When you spend most of your life with gender dysphoria, even after it dissipates or disappears entirely, you can find it affecting your life in all kinds of little ways you never expected. We talk about how and why this happens, how it just might be PTSD, and how we can cope with it. Social worker Charlie Hutchinson joins us to discuss how our body remembers the score.

Episode download: TTT094.mp3

CHARLIE HUTCHINSON
Instagram: @c_t_hutchinson
Facebook: Charlie Hutchinson
Bluesky: @charliehutch.bsky.social

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/08/22/transphobia-is-always-with-us-that-old-dysphoric-feeling/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Trans Voices 1-3, Hormone Replacement Therapy, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, Confidence 2: Into the Unknown (aka What is Happening aka A Whole New World), Freeing Up My Brain (lunch with Tilly), Gender Dysphoria, Trans Birthdays

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: December 10, 2024

Run Time: 25:59
Photos 3: Tilly's Guide to Selfies

Episode Number: 93

You asked for it, you demanded it, and that's really not fair for I am but a smol bean. Nevertheless, it's finally here... my tips for getting good selfies! We're gonna talk about cameras and lighting and lenses and angles and how cameras both lie and tell the truth at the exact same time. Maybe you'll get some fire selfies out of it! Artist and scholar Errata returns to discuss the importance of visibility and what we owe to those who come after. "Disregard the haters!"

Episode download: TTT093.mp3

ERRATA
Bluesky: @theythem.press

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/12/03/photos-3-tillys-guide-to-selfies/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, Body Hacking, Finding our Trans Style

REFERENCE MATERIAL
How Lord Of The Rings Made The Hobbits Look Small (With Almost No CGI) - https://screenrant.com/lord-rings-movie-hobbits-small-size-film-camera-how-no-cgi/
How to Make a Hobbit With Forced Perspective - https://www.wired.com/2012/12/how-to-make-a-hobbit-with-forced-perspective/
The Science Behind the Selfie (No, You Don't Really Look Like That) - https://oohstloustudios.com/the-science-of-the-selfie-no-you-dont-really-look-like-that

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: December 3, 2024

Run Time: 38:14
Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse

Episode Number: 92

What's it like when you go your whole life never seeing yourself in photos... and suddenly that changes, and you see yourself? All the time? Follow along in real-time as it blows my mind and I try to figure out exactly what the heck is happening. Artist and scholar Errata returns to discuss offering yourself grace! I have a bumpy head. And every trans selfie is an act of resistance.

Episode download: TTT092.mp3

ERRATA
Bluesky: @theythem.press

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/08/09/photos-2-the-selfie-apocalypse/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Gender Dysphoria, Photos and Reflections, Gender Euphoria, Trans Politics 1 and 2, Hormone Replacement Therapy, Trans Voices 1-3, The Past and Why it Haunts Us, Trans Grief 1 and 2, The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, One Year Out and on HRT Retrospective, Two Years Out and on HRT Retrospective, Three Years Out and on HRT Retrospective, Four Years Out and on HRT Retrospective, Sexuality is Not Gender

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: November 26, 2024

Run Time: 47:34
Photos and Reflections

Episode Number: 91

Why are photos and reflections so hard for so many trans people? What do we see when we look at them? Does it change with transition? Join me as I clunkily try to explain! Artist and scholar Errata joins us to discuss performance filters and class switching! Bad recipes for candy meat ahoy!

Episode download: TTT091.mp3

ERRATA
Bluesky: @theythem.press

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/08/08/photos-and-reflections/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Into the Unknown (What is Happening, A Whole New World), Freeing Up My Brain (Lunch with Tilly), Gender Dysphoria, Parents Who Will Never Know the Real You (my dad), A Trans Re-wedding, The Trans Allegory of Barbie, The Trans Allegory of Silo s1, The Trans Allegory of The Twilight Zone's "Nervous Man in a Four Dollar Room," The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: November 19, 2024

Run Time: 33:11
The 2024 Election Results: Where Do We Go From Here?

Episode Number: 90

Well shit. What the hell do we do now? We grieve, we rage, and we fight for each other. There's no fate but what we make.

Episode download: TTT090.mp3

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/11/10/the-2024-election-results-where-do-we-go-from-here/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
What is Trans Tuesday?, Halloween and the Fear of Embracing Your True Self, P!nk (Finding Our Own Representation), Trans Intersectionality

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Tilly on BlueSky - https://bsky.app/profile/tillybridges.bsky.social
The Tillyverse Discord Community - https://discord.gg/cSS5cjbuAZ

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: November 12, 2024

Run Time: 19:51
Trans Politics 2: You Must Vote to Protect Us

Episode Number: 89

Part 2 of our dive into politics, and there's two big asks for cis people who truly want to help. But this might get uncomfortable, because we're going to talk about the way our political system operates in the United States, and that means realizing you can't wait for perfection or moral purity. Trans lives are on the line (as are so many others), and we must protect each other as best we can. And that sometimes means voting for someone you may not like. Pinole City Treasurer candidate Rafael Menis returns to discuss environmental social governance and how the recognition of rights should be automatic! Don't. Abdicate. Your. Responsibility.

Episode download: TTT089.mp3

RAFAEL MENIS
Website: https://www.menisfortreasurer.org/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Rafael-Menis-for-Pinole-City-Treasurer-2024/61563512261174/

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/10/29/trans-politics-2-you-must-vote-to-protect-us/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Trans Politics 1: Stop Tolerating Transphobia, Trans Kids and the Intake Exam, Sexuality is Not Gender, Trans Intersectionality, The Trans Panic Defense

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Legislative Tracker: Anti-Transgender Legislation - https://freedomforallamericans.org/anti-transgender-legislation/
Stop the Sexualization of Children Act - https://mikejohnson.house.gov/uploadedfiles/johnla_083_xml.pdf
State-level anti-transgender laws increase past-year suicide attempts among transgender and non-binary young people in the USA - https://www.nature.com/articles/s41562-024-01979-5.epdf
Project 2025 Policy Agenda - https://www.project2025.org/policy/
Federal Courts: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3w8-d_fnqE
American Autocracy: Tracking Trump’s Threats to Gender-Affirming Care and the LGBTQ+ Community - https://msmagazine.com/2024/05/10/trump-trans-gay-sports-gender-care-usa-democracy/
A Second Trump Term Would Be Hell for LGBTQ People - https://www.readtpa.com/p/a-second-trump-term-would-be-hell
California Is Officially the First Sanctuary State for Trans Youth - https://www.them.us/story/california-sanctuary-state-trans-youth-gavin-newsom
Transfemicide becomes a crime in a ‘watershed’ moment for Mexico City - https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/article/2024/jul/24/mexico-city-transfemicide-law
Australia will create affordable housing for trans women in first-of-its-kind initiative - https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2024/05/australia-will-create-affordable-housing-for-trans-women-in-first-of-its-kind-initiative/
How pro-LGBTQ+ is Kamala Harris? - https://www.advocate.com/politics/kamala-harris-lgbtq-record
Kamala Harris’ Surprising Record on Trans Rights - https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2024/07/kamala-harris-vp-campaign-progressive-lgbtq-transgender-rights.html
Kamala Harris’s Record on Trans Rights Isn’t “Mixed” - https://medium.com/@courtneybswanson/kamala-harriss-record-on-trans-rights-isn-t-mixed-8101b2a0aa94
Advocates for Trans Equality Endorses Vice President Kamala Harris for President - https://transequality.org/news/advocates-trans-equality-endorses-vice-president-kamala-harris-president
Trump breaks silence on Israel's military campaign in Gaza: 'Finish the problem' - https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-israel-gaza-finish-problem-rcna141905
Trump: Biden is Too Tough on Netanyahu - https://www.yahoo.com/news/trump-biden-too-tough-netanyahu-215451570.html
“Extreme Danger”: Harris Earns a Stunning Endorsement Over Trump - https://www.yahoo.com/news/extreme-danger-harris-earns-stunning-143857259.html
The DNC Tried to Silence Her. Here’s Her Plan After Voting for Harris - https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/political-commentary/ruwa-romman-harris-dnc-gaza-uncommitted-vote-1235144105/
Maebe for Congress 2024 - https://maebeagirlforcongress.org/
Los Angeles County Population vs. State Populations - https://www.laalmanac.com/population/po04a.php
What Gov. Gavin Newsom’s order to clear homeless encampments means for the people who live in them - https://www.cnn.com/2024/07/28/us/homeless-encampments-gavin-newsom-california/index.html
John Rogers on BlueSky - https://bsky.app/profile/johnrogers.bsky.social
Vote411 - https://www.vote411.org/

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: October 29, 2024

Run Time: 51:30
Trans Politics 1: Stop Tolerating Transphobia

Episode Number: 88

This week we dive into a two-part discussion on politics as it relates to transness, and this week is all about the ways people directly or indirectly support and condone transphobia. And how, if you do that, you are not in fact my friend or an ally to trans people. We'll look at two painful examples from my own life to illustrate the harm many cis people perpetuate, sometimes without even realizing it. Pinole City Treasurer candidate Rafael Menis joins us to discuss the rotation of power! Who wants to drink from the firehose of bigotry?

Episode download: TTT088.mp3

RAFAEL MENIS
Website: https://www.menisfortreasurer.org/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Rafael-Menis-for-Pinole-City-Treasurer-2024/61563512261174/

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/08/05/trans-politics-1-cis-people-stand-up-for-us/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Trans Courage, Performative Allyship, Performative Allyship 2: False Allyship, Proactive Allyship (be an accomplice), Trans Rage, Trans Rage 2: Cis Apathy

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C
Paradox of Tolerance - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance
Tolerance is Not a Moral Precept - https://medium.com/extra-extra/tolerance-is-not-a-moral-precept-1af7007d6376
Mormons feel the backlash over their support of Prop. 8 - https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2008-nov-17-na-mormons17-story.html
New LDS Church policies relegate trans members to ‘second-class’ status - https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2024/08/19/lds-church-updates-transgender/
Dictates of Conscience: From Mormon High Priest to My New Life as a Woman - https://www.signaturebooks.com/books/p/dictates-of-conscience
Tithing in Mormonism - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tithing_in_Mormonism

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: October 22, 2024

Run Time: 40:42
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 7

Episode Number: 87

This installment of Tillyvision wraps up with the final discussion of "I Saw the TV Glow" and its trans allegory! We battle lifelong dysphoria and when everything finally comes to a head, it might just crack you open. And the ending may not be what you think. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss lovely implements!

Episode download: TTT087.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/10/15/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-7/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Unexpected Changes of Transition, Boymode and Girlmode

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: October 15, 2024

Run Time: 32:03
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 6

Episode Number: 86

It's the penultimate Tillyvision installment of our "I Saw the TV Glow" trans allegory discussion! Trasnphobia's attacking with everything it has, and it just might be the end of us. But sometimes ends can be new beginnings, if we have the courage to take that step... and a hand to help us out of the darkness. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss the trans industrial complex (we all work for Big Trans!). I don't hide my truth* from the world!

*mistakes

Episode download: TTT086.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/10/08/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-6/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Gender Dysphoria, Trans Grief 1 and 2

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: October 8, 2024

Run Time: 37:56
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 5

Episode Number: 85

"I Saw the TV Glow" in Tillyvision continues, as we regain access to the trans community, fight for and protect each other, and push each other forward. But denial is a tough beast to overcome. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss how sometimes an eggplant is just an eggplant!

Episode download: TTT085.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/10/01/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-5/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Bodily Autonomy, Cis Grief (when we come out as trans), The False Dichotomy, Trans Grief 1 and 2, The Intentional Trans Allegory of Barbie, Trans Body Hacking, Gender Euphoria

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: October 1, 2024

Run Time: 31:12
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 4

Episode Number: 84

More "I Saw the TV Glow" in Tillyvision, because we're not done yet! This week our fear is in the driver's seat and we cut off access to our transness, but we still can't help but seek that which eludes us. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss gifts of intimacy and how we drive the cars we have! Who wants to see goofy and mildly embarrassing photos of me? I did it for YOU!

Episode download: TTT084.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/24/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-4/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1), Confidence, Confidence 2: Into the Unknown (aka A Whole New World aka What is Happening?), Sexuality is not Gender, Photos and Reflections, Internalized Transphobia

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: September 24, 2024

Run Time: 29:09
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 3

Episode Number: 83

Grab your Tillyvision goggles, it's time for more "I Saw the TV Glow" trans allegory goodness! This week we talk losing access to our femininity, seeking out community, and the horrible things society tells us about ourselves. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss Hamlet and Chekhov's Egg!

Episode download: TTT083.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/17/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-3/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Hair, Hair 2, The Signs Were Always There (that we're trans), Misgendering and Passing, Internalized Transphobia, Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1), Sexuality is Not Gender

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: September 17, 2024

Run Time: 30:08
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 2

Episode Number: 82

"I Saw the TV Glow" in Tillyvision continues! This week we get our first true exploration of our own transness, and with it comes learning about transphobia in all its forms. Comic writer Lilah Sturges returns to discuss viscous liquids! Everybody do a little dance.

Episode download: TTT082.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/10/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-2/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Photos and Reflections, The False Dichotomy, Gendered Childhoods, The Intentional Trans Allegory of Barbie, Internalized Transphobia, A Trans Re-wedding, The 2022 US Trans Survey

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C
The Out to Get You podcast, episode 2 - Sleepaway Camp with Lilah Sturges - https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/02-sleepaway-camp-1983-with-lilah-sturges/id1692353804?i=1000617723984

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: September 10, 2024

Run Time: 32:30
The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 1

Episode Number: 81

Tillyvision returns to discuss the remarkable, beautiful, devastating "I Saw the TV Glow!" In this episode we talk context, establish the visual language of the film, and then dive right into examining by timestamps! If you haven't seen the movie yet definitely watch it first, but be prepared... it's heavy stuff. Comic writer Lilah Sturges joins us to discuss feeling jaded and psychic damage! There may also be Pokemon things.

Episode download: TTT081.mp3

LILAH STURGES
Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com
Insta: @lilahksturges

TEXT VERSION
https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/03/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-1/

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
The Intentional Trans Allegory of Barbie, Searching for Meaning (when you're trans and don't know it)

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: September 3, 2024

Run Time: 39:18
Trans History 2 (examples of trans people in history)

Episode Number: 80

It's still trans history month! And so this week we're going to look at a bunch of examples of trans people in history, including some times where we've very intentionally been erased. PhD student in history (sexual diversity studies) Nico Mara-McKay returns to discuss the cis agenda and coming out as left-handed! I'm gonna mangle some French! (apologies in advance)

Episode download: TTT080.mp3

NICO MARA-MCKAY
Bluesky: @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ephemeralrecord
Website: https://www.nicomaramckay.com

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Trans History 1 (how and why we name trans people in history), Gender Dysphoria, Trans Rage 2: Cis Apathy, Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1)

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Suicidality Among Transgender Youth: Elucidating the Role of Interpersonal Risk Factors - https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32345113/
The Forgotten History of the World's First Trans Clinic - https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-forgotten-history-of-the-worlds-first-trans-clinic/
Why It Took Decades for LGBTQ Stories to Be Included in Holocaust History - https://time.com/5953047/lgbtq-holocaust-stories/
The Pink Triangle - https://www.thepinktriangle.com/history/symbol.html
New Research Reveals How the Nazis Targeted Transgender People - https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/new-research-reveals-how-the-nazis-targeted-transgender-people-180982931/
Twitter thread on the willful hiding of trans people in history by @lisaquestions - https://x.com/lisaquestions/status/1525187671936512000
How This 18th Century French Spy Came Out As Trans - https://www.them.us/story/chevalier-d-eon-trans-woman
Twitter post on the willful denying of d'Eon's transness by @AlinaBoyden - https://x.com/AlinaBoyden/status/1479925768272629760
Marsha “Pay it no Mind” Johnson - https://www.outhistory.org/exhibits/show/tgi-bios/marsha-p-johnson
Twitter thread on the transness of Lou Alcott by @peytonology - https://x.com/peytonology/status/1516612189687324673
Twitter thread on trans brothers Mark and David Ferrow by @EliErlick - https://x.com/EliErlick/status/1520805459166482432
Who is the Rev. Dr. Pauli Murray? - https://www.paulimurraycenter.com/who-is-pauli
Lucy Hicks Anderson, a Black Trans Pioneer - https://www.aclu-ms.org/en/news/highlight-lucy-hicks-anderson-black-trans-pioneer
Roberta Cowell - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roberta_Cowell
Wendy Carlos, the electronic music pioneer who happens to be transgender - https://www.washingtonpost.com/outlook/wendy-carlos-the-electronic-music-pioneer-who-happens-to-be-transgender/2020/10/22/fa4f511e-d5ac-11ea-930e-d88518c57dcc_story.html
The Trans Middle Ages: Incorporating Transgender and Intersex Studies into the History of Medieval Sexuality - https://academic.oup.com/ehr/article/138/593/933/7529096
Don’t Hurt Girls When You Dance (Or Any Other Time) (Kurt Cobain) - https://unwinnable.com/2024/04/05/dont-hurt-girls-when-you-dance-or-any-other-time-kurt-cobain-nirvana/
Visit Casa Susanna, a secret house of trans women in the 1960s - https://www.advocate.com/transgender/casa-susanna#rebelltitem1
Trailblazing Transgender Doctor Saved Countless Lives - https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/trailblazing-transgender-doctor-saved-countless-lives/
Trans People Have Existed For Thousands Of Years And Other Things You Should Know About Trans People - https://www.buzzfeed.com/shawnstensberg/a-brief-history-of-being-trans
The Forgotten Trans History of the Wild West - https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/trans-history-wild-west
Museum reclassifies Roman emperor as trans woman - https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-67484645
UK museum reclassifies Roman emperor as transgender - https://www.theartnewspaper.com/2023/11/21/uk-museum-reclassifies-roman-emperor-as-transgender
BlueSky thread on Anastasios, a trans man monk affirmed in death, by @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com‬ - https://bsky.app/profile/plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com/post/3kt3zsmd6aw26
The Scythian Enarei Transgender Priestesses | Ancient Transgender History | We Have Always Existed - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABpT6e-KlOo
Inanna: the ancient Sumerian goddess of love, sensuality, fertility, procreation, and war - https://www.worldhistory.org/Inanna/
Inanna/Ishtar, followed by those who flaunt the gender binary, who transformed men into women - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inanna
Byzantine Intersectionality: Sexuality, Gender, and Race in the Middle Ages - https://press.princeton.edu/books/hardcover/9780691179452/byzantine-intersectionality
The Shape of Sex: Nonbinary Gender from Genesis to the Renaissance - https://cup.columbia.edu/book/the-shape-of-sex/9780231551366
Twitter thread on transgender longing by medieval French philosopher Kalonymus ben Kalonymus, by @TheRaDR - https://x.com/TheRaDR/status/987171135535149056

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: August 27, 2024

Run Time: 45:34
Trans History 1 (how and why we name trans people in history)

Episode Number: 79

It's trans history month! Are you fired up to learn about trans people in history? Good, because we need that fire to push back against prevailing thought in a field that doesn't know how to spot us, doesn't want to spot us, refuses to name us, and actively worked to hide our existence. So let's dive right in to talking about how we name trans people in history, and why it's absolutely vital for us to do so to combat cissexism. PhD student in history (sexual diversity studies) Nico Mara-McKay joins us to discuss cultural shifts and how transitioning is a fraught concept! Also Dirtbag Henry makes his first appearance on the pod. We've got manifestos for everyone!

Episode download: TTT079.mp3

NICO MARA-MCKAY
Bluesky: @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ephemeralrecord
Website: https://www.nicomaramckay.com

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1)

REFERENCE MATERIAL
History teacher Loukas Christodoulou - https://mastodon.nu/@Loukas
Historian Sandra Bosley - https://reliconthelethe.blogspot.com
Others of My Kind: Transatlantic Transgender Histories - Historicizing Transgender Terminology - https://ucp.manifoldapp.org/read/others-of-my-kind/section/9716e76c-7c86-4619-b2e4-9be7c9ff1cb0#_idParaDest-12
What Is Trans History? - https://www.historians.org/perspectives-article/what-is-trans-history-from-activist-and-academic-roots-a-field-takes-shape-may-2018/
Trans Historical: Gender Plurality before the Modern - https://www.amazon.com/Trans-Historical-Gender-Plurality-before/dp/1501759086
Before We Were Trans: A New History of Gender - https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/dr-kit-heyam-ph-d/before-we-were-trans/9781541603080/

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: August 20, 2024

Run Time: 38:55
Stop Staring at Us (trans people are human beings)

Episode Number: 78

Hi cis friends! Why do you stare at us? I mean, I think I know why, and so do you. And you have to know how rude it is. So then why do you do it anyway? Let's talk about just how often it happens, the ludicrous lengths you will go to in order to keep staring at us, and how incredibly insulting it is when we already do SO much just to get you to leave us alone. Geeky ttrpg-er Kristine Chester returns to discuss inspiring each other and waiting for the Vulcans. She's making history and setting precedents! And hey... if your words are bad, change them.

Episode download: TTT078.mp3

KRISTINE CHESTER
Twitter: @12thKnight

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
The Trans Allegory of Barbie, The Trans Allegory of Silo s1, Interview with Wrath Goddess Sing author Maya Deane, Privilege (time and money), The Only Trans Person You Know, Trans Intersectionality, The 2022 US Trans Survey early insights, Trans Microaggressions, Misgendering and Passing, What Real Cis Acceptance Looks Like, Cis Privilege, Bad Representation, Good Representation, TERFs, Trans Politics, Body Hair, The False Dichotomy, Gendered Clothes and Trans People, Trans Kids and the Intake Exam, Trans Sports, Trans Representation in Media 2022 and 2023, Trans Roles and Stories, Trans Rights, Trans Rights 2, Trans Voices 1-3, Legal Name and Gender Marker Change, Tucking and Binding, Boymode and Girlmode, Proactive Allyship (be an accomplice), Trans Freedom (and underwear)

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: August 13, 2024

Run Time: 43:37
Unexpected Changes from Transition

Episode Number: 77

So now you know that there are little bonuses that come with transition that we couldn't have anticipated, but did you know even more comes along with it? Sometimes there are changes to yourself and the way you exist in the world that you also could have never anticipated. And where those can lead you is sometimes surprising. Geeky ttrpg-er Kristine Chester joins us to discuss being present in your life and how ttrpgs really are evil! (no they're not) (this episode includes my Only At Comic-con wild experience from SDCC 2023!)

Episode download: TTT077.mp3

KRISTINE CHESTER
Twitter: @12thKnight

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Body Hair, Gender Euphoria, Gender Dysphoria, Finding Our Trans Style, Hair, Hair 2, Four Year Retrospective, Unexpected Bonuses of Transition, Confidence 2: Into the Unknown (A Whole New World, What is Happening), Pandemic Transition, Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, A Trans Re-wedding

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: July 23, 2024

Run Time: 47:29
Unexpected Bonuses of Transition

Episode Number: 76

There's a whole lot that every trans and nonbinary person hopes to get out of transition, but sometimes you also get small, wonderful little bits of joy you never could have anticipated. And they're all due to the world transition opens up to you. Photographer, filmmaker, and writer Rachel Kendra returns to discuss film scores, Robotech, and not hating the person in the mirror. Am I for real? Thanks so much, Reagan!

Episode download: TTT076.mp3

RACHEL KENDRA
Twitter: @rachelxkendra
Threads: @rachelxkendra
Insta: @rachelxkendra
Bluesky: @rachelxkendra
Website: rachelkendra.com

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Heavily Gendered Clothes and Trans People, Gender Euphoria, Gender Dysphoria, A Trans Re-wedding, Gendered Childhoods, Implicit Queerphobia, Internalized Transphobia

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: July 16, 2024

Run Time: 41:47
Four Year Retrospective

Episode Number: 75

I've been out publicly as trans for four years, and on hormone replacement therapy for just as long! So let's dive in to my annual check-in and see what new developments (ahem) have occurred! We're going to cover body hair, photos, exercise, confidence, voice, clothes, getting married all over again, and multiple new body changes! Photographer, filmmaker, and writer Rachel Kendra joins us to discuss the dying film industry and how it's so L.A. to first meet on a podcast! Let's just see what happens. For fun!

Episode download: TTT075.mp3

RACHEL KENDRA
Twitter: @rachelxkendra
Threads: @rachelxkendra
Insta: @rachelxkendra
Bluesky: @rachelxkendra
Website: rachelkendra.com

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
One, Two, and Three Year Retrospectives, Transition Setbacks, 2022 US Trans Survey Report, Pandemic Transition, Body Hair, Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, Performative Allyship, Body Hacking, Hair, Hair 2, Bodily Autonomy (and my tattoo), Confidence, Confidence 2 (aka Into the Unknown aka What is Happening aka A Whole New World), A Trans Re-wedding, Trans Voices 1-3, Anecdotal Trans Healthcare, Finding Our Trans Style

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: July 9, 2024

Run Time: 55:58
Boymode/Girlmode

Episode Number: 74

Do you know what boymoding and girlmoding are? Do you know why trans and nonbinary people would do it, especially when the chances are high that we REALLY don't want to? Guess what you're gonna learn all about this week? Let's talk about what it is, why we do it, and why it absolutely SUCKS for many of us. Priest, playwright, and theologian Shannon TL Kearns returns to discuss connecting with our bodies and trusting yourself. Feel your feelings!

Episode download: TTT074.mp3

SHANNON TL KEARNS
Twitter: @shannontlkearns
Facebook: @shannontlkearns
Insta: @shannontlkearns
Tiktok: @shannontlkearns
Website: shannontlkearns.com
In the Margins: A Transgender Man’s Journey with Scripture - https://www.amazon.com/dp/0802879489

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Heavily Gendered Clothes and Trans People, A Pandemic Transition, Confidence, A Trans Re-wedding, Gender Dysphoria, Legal Name and Gender Marker Changes, 2022 US Trans Survey Early Insights

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: July 2, 2024

Run Time: 27:35
Sexuality is Not Gender

Episode Number: 73

Too many folks confuse or conflate sexuality and gender, when they're entirely different things. But the relationship between them can definitely make figuring out that you're trans more difficult. Let's talk about why that is! Priest, playwright, and theologian Shannon TL Kearns joins us to discuss vitriol from faith-based people and how churches don't do their homework! Wait... you mean every guy who sees a pretty lady doesn't want to BE her? Are you sure??

Episode download: TTT073.mp3

SHANNON TL KEARNS
Twitter: @shannontlkearns
Facebook: @shannontlkearns
Insta: @shannontlkearns
Tiktok: @shannontlkearns
Website: shannontlkearns.com
In the Margins: A Transgender Man’s Journey with Scripture - https://www.amazon.com/dp/0802879489

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Gender Dysphoria, Photos and Reflections, Transmedicalism (and WPATH soc 1), Heavily Gendered Childhoods, The Signs Were Always There (that we're trans), Implicit Queerphobia, Internalized Transphobia

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: June 25, 2024

Run Time: 35:02
A Trans Re-wedding

Episode Number: 72

What do you do when one of the happiest days of your life was still mostly miserable due to dysphoria, and trying to live up to the lie of who you had to be? Well, my friends, you re-marry your wife as the real you! And what an absolutely mind-blowing experience it was. So my lovely wife and I are gonna talk all about it (and bouquet duels)! This is YOUR life. Be YOU. Do what makes you happy. <3

Episode download: TTT072.mp3

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
Gender Dysphoria, Heavily Gendered Clothes and Trans People, Trans Grief, Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, The Signs Were Always There (that we're trans), Finding Our Own Representation (P!nk), Confidence, Parents Who Will Never Know the Real You (aka my dad), Cis Spousal and Partner Support

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Tilly and Susan's Re-wedding playlist - https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vTbRK7WdmDTdNp14ZRP0V9ImfbiScCJUpBHi0XJsfDysYko4-MNfTjMAVKe0WsMg5u0qnxzhtsZxgEq/pub

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: June 18, 2024

Run Time: 39:42
Cis Spousal and Partner Support

Episode Number: 71

There's an epidemic of cis spouses and partners leaving trans people when we come out. Worse, some cis spouses and partners hold relationships, homes, even children over us, with the threat of losing them if we transition. So let's talk about why the support of our cis partners is so vital, what it looks like, and why the opposite is so entirely devastating (and wrong). Artist Andy Alves and writer Ben Crane join us to discuss what transition was like for them and their relationship (find them at HeroesCon June 14-16)! I'm Susan's pal, and shits are fine.

Episode download: TTT071.mp3

ANDY ALVES
ArtStation: artstation.com/andyalves

BEN CRANE
Insta: @benacrane
Bluesky: @bencrane.bsky.social

FURTHER READING
(topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com)
The 2022 US Trans Survey report, Anecdotal Trans Healthcare, Privilege (time and money), Trans Intersectionality, Body Hacking, Finding Our Own Representation (P!nk), Gender Dysphoria, Cis Grief, The Signs Were Always There, Implicit Queerphobia, Internalized Transphobia

REFERENCE MATERIAL
Cosmic Cadets - https://bookshop.org/p/books/cosmic-cadets-book-one-contact-ben-crane/18747133
A Man of Lies - https://bookshop.org/p/books/a-man-of-lies/18940042
Divorce Issues for Transgender People - https://www.mundahllaw.com/divorce-issues-transgender-people/
Divorce Court Can’t Deal With ‘A Different Category of Spouse’ - https://www.glad.org/tfl/stories/divorce-court-cant-deal-different-category-spouse/

Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music.
Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane

Release Date: June 11, 2024

Run Time: 48:30

Main menu

Tilly's Trans Tuesdays

Episode Archive

Trans Trauma 2: Societal Gaslighting

Trans Trauma 1: That Old Dysphoric Feeling

Photos 3: Tilly's Guide to Selfies

Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse

Photos and Reflections

The 2024 Election Results: Where Do We Go From Here?

Trans Politics 2: You Must Vote to Protect Us

Trans Politics 1: Stop Tolerating Transphobia

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 7

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 6

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 5

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 4

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 3

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 2

The Trans Allegory of I Saw the TV Glow, part 1

Trans History 2 (examples of trans people in history)

Trans History 1 (how and why we name trans people in history)

Stop Staring at Us (trans people are human beings)

Unexpected Changes from Transition

Unexpected Bonuses of Transition

Four Year Retrospective

Boymode/Girlmode

Sexuality is Not Gender

A Trans Re-wedding

Cis Spousal and Partner Support

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